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I’ve found in my clinical work with singles and couples that there are a few red flags that are more serious – or redder, if you will – than others. There’s no need to expand any further – you’ll know it when you see it, and you have to kick that date to the curb right away.

If you break into a mild sweat as you read the list below, it can’t mean something good! There’s no question that dating can be stressful and intimidating, and that a little alcohol can help grease the wheels and put you at ease. Don’t overthink it – just do it and thank me for it later. Saying “yes” to an invitation for a date does not grant your date a VIP pass to your most private thoughts and feelings.

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Trust me: If you choose to continue dating, sooner or later you will end up on the receiving end of that nastiness. No joke: Head for the hills if your date starts mouthing off about his or her ex.

Relationships rarely end because of the fault of only one member of the couple, so anyone who speaks badly about an ex on a date lacks insight into why the relationship really failed.

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